Taiwanese Scootering 101

The rules of scootering* in this fine country are as follows:
*Accepted word here in Taiwan.  Usage: B: Yo, S, how are we getting to lunch today?  S: Well, B, I would imagine that we will be scootering over.  Remember your helmet!

1) Red Lights: Optional; mere suggestion as to the rules of the road.  This ONLY applies to scooters.  For cars, red lights are important but scooters can get away with it.  Example: Bess and N on scooter approaching a red light.  N slows down, peers around as best as he can and then proceeds through the red light once it has been confirmed that there is no danger (laughing maniacally is optional).  Exception: Some intersections here do have cameras and can snap a picture of you running a red light however the fine is the equivalent of US$8.00 and once you've learned which intersections have cameras, you're all set to go.

2) Left Turns.  Infographic time!  The legal scooter left turn is as follows.  At a green light the scooter progresses to the "Scooter Box" which is in front of the traffic stopped at a red light.  When the light there changes to green, then the scooters cross the intersection. 

3) "Gangsta" turns.  The above form of left turns can take a while.  If you approach an intersection at a red light then you have to wait to get a green, then wait in the box for the lights to change again.  Sometimes people can get impatient, thus the hooligan turn.  The hooligan/Gangsta turn involves pretending you are a bicyclist or pedestrian for a few moments.  The scooter turns left and follows the crosswalk directly in front of it and then waits at the corner for a break in traffic (or hangs out in a shady spot) and then follows the crosswalk again to reach the ultimate goal of going left.

4) Shade Stops.  I cannot imagine a shade stop being performed successfully in the States without much blaring of horns.  However, here, the Taiwanese are SO afraid of the sun, it is completely acceptable.  In order to properly execute a traditional Shade Stop one must be approaching a light that is red or about to turn red, and realizing that the area where one would normally stop is in direct sunlight the scooterist stops at the most convenient place of shade until the light changes to green again.   Variations of the Shade Stop are a plenty.  A hooligan left turn may be executed if the accessible corner has a store overhang (in which case one drives the scooter into the store to access the shade) or a tree which is casting a shadow in an appropriate (or inappropriate, makes no difference) direction.  Similarly, the boundaries of the Left Turn Box can be extended considerably endlessly in any direction to include shade of any sort.  Shade Stops are not limited to scooters.  Many cars will also execute a Shade Stop causing any cars not wishing to stop there to veer into oncoming traffic to go around the stopped cars and scooters.  This happens all the time, successfully, without any blaring of horns. 

5) Horns.  The horn beep in Taiwan is far different from that in the States and in execution is almost exactly opposite that in NYC.  The beep is almost always nice and is usually meant to be a courtesy.  A beep as you are coming up behind someone usually means, "yoo hoo, just lettin' ya know I'm here."  A beep as you are turning left is a "please don't hit me" and a beep to a car usually means, "Hey friend, I'd really like to be able to sneak past you so I can turn right without waiting for the light to change."  I've never heard a malicious beep.  Truthfully, the horns on scooters are not strong enough to be construed as malicious.  They are a little hard to take seriously sometimes. 

6) Capacity.  There are no rules regarding what, whom, or how much you carry on your scooter.  You might be a Taiwanese scooterist if you:
   -are carrying your pregnant wife and your four children on your scooter with you
   -have a small child (toddler) seated on a small stool at your feet facing backwards (directly towards your crotch)
   -have a child in a stroller that is half collapsed between yourself and the handlebars
   -have one or more "baby bags" strapped to you with one or more infants in each.
   -you are carrying one or more large sheets of plywood on your scooter
   -you have a cat, dog, mouse, chicken, or loose ferret riding on your scooter with you either on your lap or sitting at your feet without any sort of leash or cage. 
   -you are holding a large heavy box in one hand, have a similarly large heavy box on your lap, and at least two more at your feet while steering with your one remaining hand. 
   -you are holding an infant in your lap or in your "free" arm while driving with the other. 

Yes, I have seen all of these happen and many more. 

7) Attire.  Thou must ALWAYS be properly dressed.  You will look the part of a Taiwanese scooterist if you:
   -have taken the time to attach oven mitts to the handle bars of your scooter to protect your hands from the sun while scootering.  (Not joking folks.)
   -look outside and at the thermometer and think, "It is sunny and 33 degrees Celsius; I should probably grab a jacket." (For you Americans, it is 34 degrees Celsius today and that is about 94 degrees Fahrenheit)
   -have adapted tall socks to wear on your arms as sleeves
   -wear a blanket or towel over your shoulders or legs while driving (variable wind flapping is appropriate.) 
   -wear a fabric mask and scarf to protect your face from the sun and from the air pollution.  (Note: I haven't really noticed the air pollution yet.  The rain does a good job of clearing it out but I hear it can get bad at times)

8) Versatility.  A scooter can go anywhere it will fit.  If you can safely (or not safely) sneak a scooter through an area then it is appropriate to have your scooter there.  Sidewalks? For sure.  Storefronts? No problemo.  Tiny walk ways between sidewalks?  Absolutely.  Down the median?  Oh, you betcha.  Similarly, if there is space big enough for your scooter then it is an appropriate parking spot.  Sometimes, you'll see red paint on the curb.  That is really there to encourage you to park your scooter in that area.  They love it when you do that.  (Teehee ;-) )

9) Helmets.  Everyone wears them.  They are a must.  However, the structural integrity of your helmet is up to you.  (Also, sometimes you see kids on scooters (see rule 6) without helmets and it makes you angry.)  

10) Signalling.  Don't do it.  I'm convinced that using your blinker actually just confuses the Taiwanese more.  N insists on using it as his one connection to the American driving style.  


There you go readers.  You have learned all you need to know about scootering in Taiwan in 10 simple rules.  Got it?  Alright, I'll see you out on the road.  I'll be the one in the sweet orange helmet.